i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
