oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
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it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
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watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
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