Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
