i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
