One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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