similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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