I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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