I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
