the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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