You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
