what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
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