I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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