all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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