So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
