I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
