OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
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