brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Randomize
