i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
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