Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize
