Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
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