She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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