How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
