As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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