i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
