i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
