Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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