She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
