I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Randomize