ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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