I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
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