And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
