i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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