i don't plan on having that self control this summer
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
