i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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