butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
