What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
