Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
