You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
