but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
