Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize