Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize