it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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