I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
time to smoke my breakfast
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
I party with great urgency now.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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