I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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