How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
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