Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
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