toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
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