I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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