He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
