Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize
