Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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